WEBVTT 00:16.940 --> 00:20.430 life's not fair , but you 00:20.580 --> 00:23.490 learn to drive on . So I lost the one 00:23.490 --> 00:25.910 year old daughter and had some time in 00:25.910 --> 00:28.440 the services . Well , unless somebody's 00:28.450 --> 00:30.394 to include a really good friend in 00:30.394 --> 00:32.617 Afghanistan and you learn to drive on , 00:32.617 --> 00:34.839 you come home and you do what you gotta 00:34.839 --> 00:36.950 do . You stay strong . You don't show 00:36.950 --> 00:39.172 weakness . I'm worried that there was a 00:39.172 --> 00:41.290 stigma associated with some of the 00:41.300 --> 00:44.230 things I went through and other shame 00:44.230 --> 00:46.530 if you show weakness . And that's the 00:46.530 --> 00:48.308 way I felt , you know , through 00:48.308 --> 00:50.252 somebody's traumatic experiences . 00:52.350 --> 00:54.406 I didn't realize I had some symptoms 00:54.406 --> 00:56.400 and really was forgetfulness , 00:56.950 --> 01:00.090 disinterest in activities , didn't want 01:00.090 --> 01:02.240 to have relationships , get some 01:02.240 --> 01:04.800 nightmares , hit my wife in bed during 01:04.800 --> 01:08.770 my sleep . And my wife just learned 01:08.770 --> 01:10.937 to deal with it somehow and to support 01:10.937 --> 01:13.330 me , not knowing all these experiences 01:13.330 --> 01:15.441 that went through and the effect that 01:15.441 --> 01:17.497 they have on me through aggression , 01:17.497 --> 01:19.620 the fear , the anxiety , they never 01:19.620 --> 01:21.287 manifested themselves . In my 01:21.287 --> 01:22.460 professional life , 01:25.470 --> 01:28.320 I was doing well as a captain and 01:28.320 --> 01:30.850 industry and on the military . I had a 01:30.860 --> 01:32.770 great career as well , with early 01:32.770 --> 01:36.080 promotions and doing all the right 01:36.090 --> 01:38.410 things and helping soldiers out in 01:38.720 --> 01:40.720 getting ready for what we needed to 01:40.720 --> 01:44.630 nuclear war . There's a day at 01:44.630 --> 01:46.852 work . I was having chest pains , and I 01:46.852 --> 01:49.019 literally thought I was having a heart 01:49.019 --> 01:51.270 attack . My civilian employer actually 01:51.270 --> 01:53.381 called the ambulance that went to the 01:53.381 --> 01:57.180 emergency room . I had a full battery 01:57.180 --> 01:59.550 of tests for my heart . See if there's 01:59.550 --> 02:01.910 any pulmonary conditions and 02:01.920 --> 02:03.976 neurological issues that I may had , 02:03.976 --> 02:06.340 and I came out as fully functional , 02:06.610 --> 02:10.120 fully physical , fit , individual . At 02:10.120 --> 02:12.342 this point in life , I didn't know that 02:12.342 --> 02:14.453 these are all signs of post traumatic 02:14.453 --> 02:16.564 stress . So about another month after 02:16.564 --> 02:18.287 that , my general practitioner 02:18.287 --> 02:20.620 diagnosed me with post traumatic stress . 02:20.680 --> 02:22.950 I put on a regimen of different pills , 02:22.950 --> 02:25.760 everything from benzos toe clonazepam 02:25.770 --> 02:27.826 for prescribed medication on a daily 02:27.826 --> 02:30.048 basis . I'm not sure how my wife handle 02:30.048 --> 02:32.159 this . She's She's an angel in a much 02:32.159 --> 02:35.690 stronger person and me she put up with 02:35.690 --> 02:38.870 me and handle the household , and it 02:38.870 --> 02:41.520 came to a culminating point about three 02:41.520 --> 02:43.770 years into this that she told me she 02:43.770 --> 02:45.937 can't handle it anymore , and I needed 02:45.937 --> 02:49.600 to seek help . December 02:49.600 --> 02:52.710 30th 2000 and nine is the data and my 02:52.710 --> 02:55.220 wife to help them change my life by 02:55.220 --> 02:56.831 Tell me , Go to the Veterans 02:56.831 --> 02:58.831 Administration . Three days later , 02:58.831 --> 03:01.470 January 2nd , 2010 I was in the 03:01.470 --> 03:04.130 emergency room , and urgent care 03:04.400 --> 03:07.010 started going through what would be a 03:07.010 --> 03:09.121 journey for the rest of my life . For 03:09.121 --> 03:10.788 about a month later , I saw a 03:10.788 --> 03:14.650 psychologist , uh , Dr C . Ah . 03:15.620 --> 03:17.564 To this day , she's another person 03:17.564 --> 03:19.731 that's helped me in life . I asked her 03:19.731 --> 03:22.770 for my 90 day plan in my road to 03:22.770 --> 03:24.937 getting better , and that was 10 years 03:24.937 --> 03:27.040 ago to the day . There is no 90 day 03:27.040 --> 03:29.390 plan . There's not a one day plan . 03:29.390 --> 03:31.612 There's not a one year plan or a decade 03:31.612 --> 03:33.946 long plan . It's different for everyone . 03:33.946 --> 03:36.057 But I could guarantee you if you seek 03:36.057 --> 03:38.490 treatment and get some help , you will 03:38.490 --> 03:41.670 get better . I'm happy to say that the 03:41.670 --> 03:43.726 relationship I have with my wife and 03:43.820 --> 03:46.750 now three Children is a lot better , uh , 03:47.190 --> 03:49.301 fully progress . I'd like to share my 03:49.301 --> 03:51.523 story today , probably for for the fact 03:51.523 --> 03:54.000 that I know what I went through , and 03:54.010 --> 03:55.899 other folks should not have to go 03:55.899 --> 03:57.899 through the same thing . There's no 03:57.899 --> 04:00.230 stigma . There's no fear that you 04:00.230 --> 04:02.840 should have . There's no shame with 04:02.850 --> 04:04.683 getting help for a mental health 04:04.683 --> 04:06.906 disorder . And at the end of the day is 04:06.906 --> 04:09.128 really got the opposite effect . If you 04:09.128 --> 04:11.294 go get help when we're stronger person 04:11.294 --> 04:13.628 me , stronger soldier , husband or wife . 04:13.628 --> 04:16.400 Brother , sister , My name is Brigadier 04:16.400 --> 04:18.400 General Ernie Lipinski , and I have 04:18.400 --> 04:19.000 post traumatic stress .